I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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