Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize