At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
