I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
