you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
