Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
