We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize