Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
