Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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