I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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