I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
