i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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