"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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