Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
