How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
