shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Terrible idea I love it
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize