you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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