i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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