need another drink. this is the easiest way
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I think I sprained my soul last night
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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