please come you make the beer taste better
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
