Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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