I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
