if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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