Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
