Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
