Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
