please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i just had sex bonerless
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
