Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You're a waste of cheezeits
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
