babies were throwing up all over the place
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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