Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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