Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
