I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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