She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
