You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
