so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
