I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize