it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
