I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Oh god it's open bar.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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