I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Dear god my vagina.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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