Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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