He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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