she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize