I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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