It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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