i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
i think i just lost a toe
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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