try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize