i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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