I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I just blew my weed a kiss
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
