All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I'm at about main and main street
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize