I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
