people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
